


Good afternoon on BBC Radio Manchester

by greedy_dancer



Series: Tumblr ficlets [7]
Category: One Direction (Band), Radio 1 RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Radio, Baking, Innuendo, M/M, Notfic, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-29
Updated: 2014-05-29
Packaged: 2018-01-27 00:48:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,375
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1708853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/greedy_dancer/pseuds/greedy_dancer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nick co-hosts a daytime local radio show; Harry is the cooking and gardening expert. You could cut the sexual tension in the studio with gardening shears.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Good afternoon on BBC Radio Manchester

**Author's Note:**

> I tweeted the basics of this right after Nick finished his Big Weekend promo interview on BBC Radio Scotland. The Scottish radio show started talking about “high heel gardening clogs” worn by men, and if that doesn’t scream AU where Nick is a daytime presenter to you, I don’t even know what your life is about.
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't know anything about local BBC radio stations, sorry.

Nick co-hosts a daytime show with Fiona, about cooking and gardening and going to (actual) book festivals on a small local station. Obviously Fiona provides the actual advice and Nick is the comic relief. He’s hilarious and faily - Nick at a _book festival?_ \- but also occasionally insightful and weirdly deep and the guests all love him.

As for Harry, he’s the young cooking/gardening correspondent. He replaced Eddie, the previous one, a silver-haired lady who moved to the south of France with her wife when she retired - and from the initials on the station paperwork, Nick thought “H. Styles” would be another slightly-past-middle-age lady, perhaps called Helen or Hortense. He already had plans to seduce her into baking him pies just like Eddie used to. Nick really misses Eddie’s pies, even if his trousers do feel looser around the waist since she’s gone.

But instead of a Hortense Nick gets a Harry. Harry is not a slightly-past-middle-age lady. Harry is pretty much the _opposite_ of a slightly past-middle-age lady, in that he is definitely a guy, and also much too young to know anything about cooking or gardening, and rather than seducing him for pies Nick would very much like to cut out the middle-pastries, and eat _him._

Except he won’t. Because it would be unprofessional. 

(That’s right, Nick’s decision not to make a move on that hot young dream of a guy has nothing to do with his insecurities, or any issues involving fear of rejection and/or emotional intimacy. No, it’s all about making reasonable adult decisions to maintain the standards of appropriate professional behaviour a fine institution like the BBC demands and deserves.)

(Fiona nearly pisses herself, the first time she hears that speech. Producer Matt and Producer Ian choke on their beers. They’ve been running a pool on how long it’s going to take since before Nick and Harry even met - Matt walked past Harry as he was coming out of the HR office and that was all it took for him to start sending Ian and Fiona aubergine emojis.)

So there is absolutely nothing going on between Nick and Harry. No real flirting via the medium of gardening metaphors. If the occurrences of the show being used for Scott Mills’ Innuendo Bingo skyrocket after Harry’s arrival, it’s only because they play up the chemistry for entertainment.

(Harry: “The trick to great buns is the kneading.”

Nick: “Love a good bun kneading, me!”

Matt, in the background: “WE KNOW!)

Of course, being professional doesn’t mean Nick avoids Harry altogether. In fact, it would be quite hard to, as Harry always seems to mysteriously be invited to all the team’s ~~pub evenings~~ production meetings.

(Nick, hissing at Ian when it’s Harry’s turn to get his round from the bar: “What’s he doing here?”

Ian: “It’s the team meeting! He’s part of the team, isn’t he?”

Nick: “Noooo, Fiona and I and you and Matt are part of the team. He just comes in twice a week and rambles for 10 minutes about tips for, for- ploughing! And, and, raising agents!”

Fiona, in a dreamy voice: “He does looks like he knows something about ploughing.”

Matt: “Oh god, I’m not even going to touch that one.”

Nick, a drunken mumble getting away from him: “I bloody well hope not!”

Harry, precariously cradling 5 pints in his arms: “Right, so who’s thirsty?”

He keeps smiling big and guileless even though he obviously doesn’t understand why three out of four of his colleagues just burst into laughter while Nick hides his face in his hands.)

They keep going like this for a while, Nick pining in the most strong, silent and self-sacrificing way - Matt: “I beg of you, _as your producer_ , ask him out if it’ll stop you moaning about it!” - and Harry going on with being his charming, flirty self.

Because that’s the rub, isn’t it. Harry just _flirts._ With Nick, yeah, but with everyone at the station, and everyone at the pubs, and probably everyone everywhere he goes. That’s just what he does, it doesn’t _mean_ anything. Nick should know, he’s an A* flirt himself. And as long as Nick doesn’t do anything about it, doesn’t start imagining Harry’s flirting specifically with him, then it’s alright that he can’t have Harry. But if he does ask Harry out - and how would he even do that, he’s only been on one date in his life, no matter what his evil co-workers say, and it was awful - if he does ask, right, and Harry says _no._ Then. Well. Nick’s not sure he could take that and still come to work every day.

Of course, unbeknownst to Nick, Harry’s been doing some pining on his own, and he’s getting a little desperate. Nick’s sending him some really mixed signals! He always talks about how fits Harry is, on the days Harry’s not doing his segment (of course Harry listens every day while he waters his plants or takes cuttings from a tree or experiments with a new recipe for the show). But when Harry’s in the studio, all Nick seems to talk about is how he doesn’t do relationship and forgets he’s dating people and hates being touched - all the while ogling Harry’s arse when he thinks he’s not looking. Harry is very confused, but he also can’t really make a move on his boss! Or, not technically his boss but his co-worker who is much more valuable to the station than Harry, so it’s probably a bad idea to make the first move and potentially incur rejection and awkwardness.

He’s tried sending stronger messages. He baked Nick’s favourite pie to congratulate him after the station’s charity football match - Nick didn’t come in, having spent the night in A&E. He brought him flowers - and ended up giving them to Clare from the office because it was her birthday and Nick said flowers made his asthma flare up. He made cupcakes and baked a hidden heart design into one of them - Nick: “Oh, sorry love, didn’t I tell you I’m gluten-free now?” Harry was gutted, especially as he heard on the next show that Nick’s newest health craze lasted for all of seven hours, until he forgot about it in a drunken haze and had a Big Mac. Matt ended up eating Nick’s heart-cupcake but didn’t say anything on air, thank god, just gave Harry a knowing look in the studio and later a slap over the head and a hissed “ _Just talk to him, I swear to god!_ " as he passed him in the hallway after the show.

Matt’s right. Something’s gotta give. You could cut the sexual tension in the studio with gardening shears.

In the end, it’s hard to say who takes the decisive step. It’s Nick who invites Harry over to his house to “come have a look at his dying plant,” but it’s Harry who walks up to Nick and puts his hand on his waist. It’s Nick who says “Finally,” but it’s Harry who goes up on tiptoes to press his mouth against Nick’s. It’s Nick who walks Harry backwards to the couch but it’s Harry who lets himself fall onto it, holding on to Nick’s shirt until he falls on top of him. It’s Nick who takes off Harry’s shirt but Harry who shoves his hand into Nick’s jeans. It’s Nick who takes Harry into his mouth, but it’s Harry who asks for Nick’s fingers.

(They come together, Harry squeezing tight around Nick, and they shiver in unison when Nick pulls out.)

They get a rounds of applause next time they enter the studio, which is mortifying, but not as much as the solemn promise they have to make to Matt that they won’t let it affect their on-air dynamic.

They don’t. A few months later, Scott Mills dubs their show “even worse than Bake Off” and vows to stop using their clips for Innuendo Bingo. That evening, Harry bakes special biscuits for the occasion and makes Nick help decorate them. Nick whines all the way through, but even he has to admit - the team’s squeals of horrified delight when presented with tiny pink cock biscuits are _definitely_ worth it.

And they all live happily ever after.

THE END.

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted [on Tumblr](http://greedydancer.tumblr.com/post/87145533592/heres-a-ficlet-about-nick-harry-working-in-daytime).


End file.
